Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Why can't my life be easier?

What started off as a great weekend ended in disaster! It was my ex's weekend, and he took Miller & Matt and left Maggie with me. She had a Halloween slumber party Friday nite, and he let her stay. Saturday, Maggie and I had the best time. We went shopping, out to eat, to a movie and then more shopping. She was soooo sweet. She kept telling me that it was "the best day ever!" When you're a single Mom, any time you are able to spend with just one child is truly a time to be treasured.

Sunday morning, we got up and went to church. After church, we went to my Mom's. The three of us decided to go eat at Cracker Barrel. Well, Mom takes a tumble on the way into the restaurant - scared me 1/2 to death. After about 20 minutes or so, we were able to get her up and into the restaurant. While we were waiting on our food, the ex met us there with Miller and Matt. Fast forward... After the kids got out of AWANAs, we came home and started winding down. I typically try to have the kids in bed, lights out, TVs off by 8:30. We are getting ready to move, and I was going through a bunch of clothes and realized it was time for the Maggie & Miller to take their nighttime medicine. So, since I was in the middle of something, I sent Maggie to the kitchen to take hers. Miller was in the kitchen, so she left the bottle open for him to get his medicine. Well, the little fart decided he would take FOUR of them, instead of one. He proceeds to inform me of this, while I'm nuking their dinners in the microwave. Anyway, I call the ER, they have me call poison control. Poison control has me take hime to the ER.

We end up at the Medical Center ER. I was so scared. Then, there was the feeling of guilt. I should have stopped what I was doing and given them the medicine myself. Then the fear returns. I have NEVER IN MY LIFE felt so alone and scared!!!! Fortunately, the amount he took would only make him EXTREMELY sleepy. Unfortunately, my divorce papers state I must contact the ex in cases such as this. I do, and am chastised about allowing a 9 1/2 year-old to take her own medicine. Just about the time we get settled into the ER room, he arrives from Houston. I am grateful that he was rather pleasant. Fast forward... Miller slept until 10:30 yesterday morning. He woke up "wide-open!" He was his normal hyper self.

Wild Man returned to school today, and I forgot to send a note with him. Well, the teacher asked why he was out, and he told her. When the kids get out of school, Maggie informs my mother that Child Protective Services showed up at school and interviewe her. I later found out they also interviewed Miller. I got home this evening to find a card from a CPS investigator. I am under investigation by CPS for child abuse or neglect. I cannot believe this is happening!!! I absolutely ADORE my children. I may not be the traditional mother, but I love them sooooo much! To have someone accuse me of intentionally harming one of my children is one of the most humiliating, hurtful things I have ever been through. So, now I will be going through an investigation, homes visits, having friends interviewed, etc.

I'm not sure if I will ever know who reported me - the school, the hospital or my ex-mother-in-law, but I have absolutely NOTHING to hide!!!!! I have not abused my kids, and I have never neglected them!

Right now, I am feeling so alone, scared, worried, etc. I do not understand why, when things were starting to look better for us, they had to take yet another detour! Why is it that I am not allowed to just fall into that "rut" that many people complain about? I would sooooo love to find that!

Please pray for me and the kids. This is going to be a long and very stressful process. I had just found hope, and now this...

3 comments:

Jenn said...

Oh, glenna...I can't believe it. I know you are scared and the only thing I can come up with (cause I'm seriously hanging my jaw on the floor) is this...Ps. 46:10...Be still and know that I am God...

I wish I had words of wisdom and I wish I could do something. I know there are no words or actions that can help, but I will pray for you. You are not alone...

melanie said...

Oh my heavens!! Hon, you are a GOOD MOM. Don't you let this make you doubt that! Brendan ate an entire sleeve of prevacid because we left it out on the counter. It happens. Praying that your caseworker sees this and that it's resolved quickly. Praying for you and the kids.

Michael Paine said...

Exodus also says "Be still and the Lord will fight for you." Honey God has some big muscles! You are a great mom and this will pass. By the way you are not alone we will be there for you whatever you may need give me a call 985-687-8700. Love you that rhythm will come :) {hugs}