Things I have learned in Motherhood...

Well, I woke up this morning, definitely more upbeat than I have been over the last few days. Let's just hope it stays that way. LOL

This morning, I was thinking about a lot of things I have learned over the past 9 years, since Maggie was born. So, here we go:

Blonde is NOT just a hair color. It is a personality trait.

Boys are DEFINITELY different than girls.

Peeing all over and around the toilet is something boys have inherited.

Boys do not carry a gene for sensitivity toward sisters.

Never underestimate the intelligence of your youngest child.

Your older children can be more scared of your youngest child, than she is of them.

If you do not want it repeated, do not say it in front of your kids.

Girls have a magnet that tends to pull everything from the closets and off the shelves, as they walk through a room.

A clean room is one with pathways to the bed and TV.

A bed is made when the comforter is thrown across the bed & the pillow laid on top.

Chips - the breakfast of champions.

Caffeine is my friend.

It is possible to stay up until 2:00 with one child, and then wake up at 6:00 with another (see above).

A shopping trip to Wal-Mart, without kids, is considered a mini-vacation.

My house will never be as clean as it was, prior to the birth of child #3.

Xanax should be a requirement for all single Moms with more than 2 children.

Parents that say their kid has ADHD are not just using it as a cop-out for bad parenting.

It is NOT possible for a 4 y/o girl to pee standing up.

If your son says he needs to pee, and you hear the back door shut, you might want to check this out.

A 3 y/o child has a general idea of where a tampon goes.

No matter what you think, a 3 y/o will think the haircut they gave themselves is wonderful.

A 4 y/o can match clothes better than a 9 y/o.

Little boys can be grumpier than old men.

Life is NOT like a box of chocolates. It's more like the stinking can of peanuts with the springy snakes that pop out. You know something is gonna happen, but it still surprises the snot out of ya.

Although you may not be able to see the bo-bo, it does require a band-aid.

Any time you hear "Uh, Oh," grab the paper towels, mop, broom and dust pan.

After a bath, it is possible for there to be more water on the floor than in the tub.

"Nobody" did it.

It is physically impossible for kids to get their dirty clothes in the hamper, although it is only 6 inches away.

The most glorious time of motherhood is the day you realize you will never have to purchase and/or change another diaper, until you have grandchildren!!!

Most importantly, learn to just "go with it." The house will never be clean, the laundry will never be finished and you will never be able to please all of them at the same time.